Stupid catholics

In the news today a Scottish Catholic highish up the hierarchy was getting all hot and bothered about a woman's choice to have an abortion. You probably know how they go about these things so I won't to into it.

What's really strange though is that according to a recently released document from Church's International Theological Commission, abortions are actually the most merciful (in the Catholic skew) thing that can happen to an unborn.

Reported here the document states that the concept of 'limbo' was actually wrong all along. (Limbo for those who have better things to do than digest exdogma, is where the nice people before jesus came along, and children who have not been baptised yet go when death occurs).

Now kids who haven't been baptised get a direct entrance to heaven. So you see, aborted babies now go straight to sugarcandy mountain where they are free to dance around and make daisy chains.

I'm not sure what doctrine says about the abortionists/mother/whoever has ever looked at the former two, but sacrificing their mortal souls to guarantee the salvation of others, that's got to be worth something?

Isn't dogma fun?

The towel problem

At work, that still sounds strange, there are three towels in the behind-the-scenes bit. There are two towels for drying cups and what not, the other towel is for drying hands after going to the loo.

I have no idea which is which.

I've tried to reason my way through it. All three towels are in a row just outside the loo infront of the sink, so I think it's reasonable that the one for drying your hands would be the one closest to the loo. It's also the one that has a different design to the other two towels.

I darent ask anyone, I've been there too long to suggest I've been drying my hands on the wrong towel. If I've just washed my hands and there is someone there, I hold my hands infront of me, dripping on my shoes, making small talk until they turn away and quickly use what I think is the right towel.

In essence I shouldn't matter should it? After washing my hands they should be clean, there's just the automatic ewwww factor to contend with.

Ever write something down and then come back to it months later and wonder what the hell you were getting at?

In the margin of my notebook I've writen a note that says:

Loo roll face

What the hell does that mean?

Danger, you might learn something.

I'm sure you have wondered, like me, why all the countries in south America speak Spanish except for Brazil where they speak Portuguese?

Now I have an answer thanks to the book I'm reading at the moment called American Colonies by Alan Taylor.

Turns out that when Spain and Portugal bickering over stuff in the Atlantic (territory, resources, slaves etc) the Pope eventually had to step in and cool things down (luckily Portugal and Spain were both devoutly Catholic).

At this point all that was known of the Americas was Hispaniola (what is now Haiti and the Dominican Republic) and some surrounding islands.

So the Pope said that everything east of halfway to Hispaniola would be for Portugal (Africa mainly but also possible routes to Asia), and everything west of halfway would be Spanish.

Further exploration revealed that South America stuck out further into the Atlantic ocean, crossing that midpoint, and so it became Portuguese.

There you go.

Every physics teachers's dream

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A month or two back there was a radio campaign for the Samaritans. It was about twenty seconds of bloody annoying sounds to represent stress. Then all went silent. Then a man in a serious voice came on and said

"Need to talk to someone? Call....or email the Samaritans at jo@samaritans.co.uk, spelt jay-ohh...."

Why not choose an email address that you don't have to spell out? Like dawn@s... etc